


Hands to Myself

by letmeinthewallsyouvebuiltaround



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: AU, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Communication is Sexy, Consent is Sexy, Eventual Smut, First Time, Friendship, Hand Jobs, Healthy Communication, Innocent!Alec, Internalized Homphobia - Referenced/Mentioned, M/M, Oral Sex, Romance, Smut, Supportive Jace Wayland, everyone is human AU, stripper!magnus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-17
Updated: 2017-07-18
Packaged: 2018-12-03 04:39:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 13,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11524737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/letmeinthewallsyouvebuiltaround/pseuds/letmeinthewallsyouvebuiltaround
Summary: After Alec comes out to his family, Jace drags Alec to an LGBT friendly strip club so he can ‘expand his horizons’ since he hasn’t even attempted to date or meet anybody new. Alec reluctantly agrees only because he’s grateful Jace is so supportive. While there, his eyes land on an intoxicating man whose body moves so fluidly Alec can’t keep his eyes off of him. Once Magnus is alone with him, he, too, finds himself enraptured by the younger man.





	1. Magnetism

**Author's Note:**

> I did my best with my very limited knowledge of what goes on in these sorts of places – sorry for any inaccuracies as I needed to improvise a lot. Title inspired from Selena Gomez’ song of the same name. Two-part series.
> 
> Can also be read on my tumblr [dylanobrienstyler](http://dylanobrienstyler.tumblr.com/post/163076300726/hands-to-myself-part-i). Feedback of all kinds appreciated! Thanks for reading.

"You know, we really don't have to do this."

His adoptive brother threw him a look, lips twisted in a smirk. "Oh come ON, Alec. It's been almost a month since you came out, and I have yet to see you even TRY to charm a fellow man. You need to see what you're missing!"

"Jace, do you really think I'm going to have a romantic awakening at a strip club?" Alec asked, eyebrows raised, but Jace simply scoffed.

"It's going to be _fun_ , Alec. It won't kill you to have fun, you know."

Alec rolled his eyes and followed the blonde into the club. _Pandemonium_. The neon lights were lit up in the colours of the pansexual flag, and Alec swallowed before entering.

He had heard of the LGBT club, known for its wildly accepted collection of personalities, gender identities and sexualities showcased, and, of course, the fact that much of it was sans clothing. New York was a place for _everyone_ to be included, and that club was a strong confirmation of that statement. Still, Alec had never been nor even knew much about it until Jace was showing him pictures on his phone that afternoon while shaking his arm to beg Alec to let him take him.

Alec normally would have said no, but he knew Jace was trying really hard to be supportive, and Alec appreciated his effort, especially since one half of their family certainly didn't share his enthusiasm. But Alec knew Jace wanted him to be happy, and that was enough to make Alec grumble out an agreement.

Coming back to the present, Alec passed over cover money to the bouncer, accepting the stamp on the back of his hand, before shrugging his hands into his pockets and rocking back on his heels.

It was an interesting sight – Alec hadn't been much of a bar guy, even after he turned twenty-one. He was more of a pub kind of person; sipping at a beer and eating fried foods while live music played or something equally relaxing was actually enjoyable. Here, there were a lot of sweaty, barely clad bodies writhing around and an overabundance of bright lights and synthetic fog happening.

"I really don't know if this is my scene." Alec commented to Jace, louder than he'd normally speak but it was necessary to be heard over the pumping music bursting from the speakers.

"Just give it an hour, please? If you really hate it, we'll go home after that." Jace promised.

Alec exhaled slowly but nodded, heading for the nearest bar. If he was going to stick around, he'd definitely need some alcohol.

Jace grinned as he caught on to his plan and bounded over to the bartender.

"What can I get you?" she asked, only the hint of a smile on her lips at the sight of the two men. Alec briefly wondered if she thought they were there together.

"Can I get a gin and tonic?" Alec said before Jace cut him off.

"Ignore my brother. He needs something stronger. What do you suggest?" Jace asked, settling onto one of the stools.

Alec followed his lead, sighing in defeat.

"First timer, huh?" the dark-skinned girl asked, eyebrow quirked.

"I couldn't be more obvious?" Alec grumbled, shooting a glare at Jace who simply grinned back.

"You work this job long enough, you start to be able to tell a lot from just reading people. It's a good place here though. There are worse places to debut into a strip club. There's a lot of respectful boundaries in place and it's pretty tasteful for the most part."

Alec nodded, appreciating the calming words. He had no idea what to expect and his comfort level at diving into new territory was, well, non-existent. He didn't want somewhere that put him on the spot too much.

The girl was mixing up their drinks as she spoke. "You don't have to know too much to get by here. You want to leave a tip, it's done here, but you're welcome to get closer to the stages to get a better view. Some places have you tip on stage by the dancer or to them directly – we try to keep more boundaries there for the safety of the dancers. Also, frankly, the money gets downright gross otherwise. And you'd be surprised how many people steal hardworking dancers' money when it's not heavily guarded."

Alec felt sick at the thought. He couldn't imagine working at a place like this, he just wasn't that comfortable with his body and was the opposite of charming, but he could imagine it took a lot of effort to put on your best face, expose yourself to strangers, showcase talent and whatever persona they had to adopt to perform, only to have the reward for it all be stolen.

She pushed their newly concocted drinks towards them and Jace passed over some bills. One sip and Alec struggled to swallow. It was strong all right, but the aftertaste smoothed things out. He took another drink as the bartender kept talking.

"The guy on the other side of the bar? That's Raphael." She nodded towards a surly looking man who definitely looked like a manager at a night club. It didn't seem like he ever saw the light of day with his pale, sallow complexion. "He's who you talk to if you want to book a private dance. We have secluded rooms for the occasion too, as some people don't want an audience. You're required to read and sign off on a checklist of dos and don'ts prior to him even calling up the dancer. If you violate any, you'll be kicked to the curb with no welcome back. Like I said, safety of the workers is really important here. And if you're looking for a prostitute, you'll need to head out and find a corner in the city, because even though some of the dancers do it on the side, business deals are not allowed to be made in here."

"Wow." Alec said with a surprise. He had no idea there was so much to it. He supposed that was best though. Places like this could probably get ugly fast if there weren't protocols and limitations in place. "Thank you, um…?"

"Maia." she replied.

"Alec."

"Jace." the blonde piped up from his spot, and Alec tried not to smile at his need to be included.

Maia chewed her tongue. "So, any questions, you know where I am. Otherwise try to relax a bit and enjoy yourself."

Alec nodded his thanks and swiveled on his stool to take in the club again. He took another gulp of his drink as he scanned the area.

There were multiple stages, both big and small, scattered throughout the large room. Poles were centered on some, some had other forms of props like hanging scarves for the more gymnastic types, and there were seating areas for best views but most people were standing and milling around.

The room also featured tall cubicle-like structures in a steady row, featuring one dancer in each. The costumes some wore were more adventurous than others, and Alec noted that across the wide arrange of dancers, there was a little bit of everything for everybody.

Some of the club was split with male dancers on one side and female dancers on another, whereas the cubicles featured a mix of both. Alec supposed that way everyone could find what they were looking for. There were also more masculine female types, dressed in what some would call 'butch' type wear, whereas there were also femme males, donned in make-up or even some dressed in stereotypically female clothing. And then the opposite, where there were rugged men and extremely feminine women.

Alec couldn't help his eyes from being drawn to one dancer straight ahead from his spot at the bar. He was of Asian descent, for sure, with sculpted arms grasping onto the pole as he swayed his hips in rhythm with the song playing.

There were mostly older men drooling at his feet, salt and pepper hair on some, and Alec wondered briefly if they were openly out or if some had wives or families at home. He knew he was growing up in a different time, and that these types of places didn't exist decades previous. Either way, the age contrast to the dancer to the audience made him a little queasy, but the dancer seemed pretty used to it. He was exchanging banter with a few, laughing and being coy, all the while moving sensually to the music.

Alec didn't even realize he was staring, but he was mesmerized. The man definitely had been dancing for a while, likely longer than his years as a stripper if his technique and physique were any indicator. He slipped out of the vest he had been wearing, letting it dip down his arms. He caught it in his elbows before smoothly discarding it, climbing back up the pole with his strong thighs, and he swiveled down as he sent a sly smile to his viewers.

"That's Magnus. He's been here a couple years. He's in pretty high demand around here. Both men and women fall at his feet." Maia commented, obviously catching on to his ogling and having finished with some other customers.

Alec swallowed, blushing at being caught, and decided he could not look at Jace if he wanted to have any dignity later.

Jace, thankfully, didn't tease him. Alec refused to chance a glance at him, but he hoped maybe Jace was distracted by the many beautiful women parading around.

Alec drained his glass and lifted a hand to signal his request for another. Maia hid a smile as she began getting it ready.

His eyes slid back to the dancing man, who was practically _thrusting_ his hips as he held his arms above his head, only letting them come down to slide sensually over his bare torso and down to cup his inner thigh.

Alec took a large gulp of the drink Maia slid his way. It was going to be a long night.

* * *

Alec tried to find somebody else to watch, tried to tame his hormones down, even going so far to watch the women at one point, but his gaze betrayed him and always seemed to trail back to Magnus again.

He felt stupid for how magnetized to the man he felt. It was embarrassing how attracted he felt to him. It wasn't just his body either—the confidence the man exuded, the coy smiles he shot out at the crowd, the sight of him laughing at something somebody said… it all was enrapturing to Alec. The few times Magnus had caught him staring and sent a wink or smile his way nearly made Alec fall off his chair.

Jace sat down next to him suddenly, and Alec jerked his eyes away from the Asian man.

"Are the bathrooms here nicer than most clubs or about the same?" Alec asked dryly, sipping more of his drink. He was on his fourth and definitely feeling it, his body humming underneath his skin. It didn't help that he was using it as a distraction from wanting to cross the room to stand before Magnus and watch the magic unfold at a much closer view. But he knew that would spell disaster, since he was embarrassing himself enough from his spot at the bar.

Jace smiled wickedly, and Alec felt his stomach turn uneasily. It was not an expression that lead to nice things in the past.

"The bathroom run was a lie, actually."

Alec raised an eyebrow. "Do I want to know what you were off doing? I know you've been sexting Clary all night, but you could at least wait for the phone sex until we're home."

Jace rolled his eyes. "Thanks for assuming I'm classless. No, I was off talking to Raphael."

Alec felt his blood run cold. It wasn't only Maia who was onto his obsession with Magnus, and Alec hadn't been helping to dispute the rumor. They had passed the hour agreement long ago and he still hadn't budged from his seat, so it didn't take a genius to figure out that he didn't want to leave and there was a very good reason.

"Jace… Please tell me you called Clary to okay you booking a private dance for yourself with a stripper and not that you—"

"I booked you a private dance with Magnus." Jace said, effectively shutting his brother up, and Alec nearly puked right then. The alcohol thrashed dangerously in his stomach.

"Please tell me you're joking." Alec rasped out, clutching onto the bar for balance.

"Alec, seriously. You don't have to marry the guy. But you're clearly attracted to him and he's obviously good at what he does, hence the small fan club he has gathered around him at all times, and, frankly, watching you stare at him is getting a little old. He's been making eyes at you too."

Alec rolled his eyes at the last comment. "For god sakes, Jace, it's his _job_. The more he makes people feel like they're 'special', the more tips he gets. I'm not even a strip club regular and I know that's how it is."

Jace held him by the shoulders. "Can you shut up and go over to Raphael to sign off on that stupid list? We came here to have fun, right? And I know you'll have fun. More than you've had, probably, well, ever."

Alec squirmed uncomfortably under his hold. He didn't need reminding that he was as virginal as they came. He had only kissed girls in his lifetime, and that was when he was trying to deny his true identity. Since then, he hadn't met anyone openly gay let alone felt a connection with anyone. He was a rather reserved, quiet person, so relationships didn't exactly come easy even without being homosexual.

"Fine. But if you wake up dead in your sleep one of these days, don't say I didn't warn you." he mumbled as he headed over to the manager.

"That doesn't even make sense!" Jace called after him, looking far too gleeful for Alec's liking.

"Hi. Um, I'm Alec. My brother sent me." he explained, nodding towards the excited idiot.

Raphael nodded in understanding, obviously expecting him. "All right, so it's pretty clearly written out here. Maia tells me she already went over some of the basics with you for our code of conduct." Great, Maia was in on it too. Did he have no one on his blend-into-the-background side? "Private dances vary from place to place, but here at Pandemonium, you're allowed to touch the dancer. That being said, no touching private parts, no kissing and generally nothing too sexual. They are performers putting on a show for you, so show them respect and communicate if something makes you uncomfortable. Also respect that they too have a comfort level, so any kink-related suggestions may need to be left at the door if they're too radical, understand? Also, all of your clothes are to remain on at all times; this is not an orgy, so keep it in your pants, literally."

Alec felt a little stunned, and about eleven-tenths embarrassed, but he nodded. He read the paper handed to him, which was pretty much all explained verbally already, so he scrawled his signature at the bottom and handed it back to him.

"I'll go grab Magnus. Luke will lead you to the private room he will meet you in."

Alec nodded and followed an intimidating looking bouncer.

"Hey, kid?"

Alec turned back to Raphael.

A hint of his smile was on his face. "Try to relax. Magnus is good at what he does. He won't push you beyond your boundaries. Have fun."

Alec, still red and only getting redder, nodded gratefully and followed Luke to a room down a hallway he hadn't noticed before.

"You can wait in here. Magnus will meet you shortly." Luke told him. "Raphael was right. Try to relax, kid. You look like you might pass out. There aren't any cameras about to expose you or something. You can be yourself here. That's the whole point."

Alec let out a breath and followed the instructions to go inside, trying to find the strength in him to take his advice. Luke closed the door behind him.

It wasn't an overly large room, but large enough that Alec understood certain dancers could put on quite the routine. There was a black couch leaning against the wall, so he sat nervously, wondering what the hell he was going to say to the man he'd be ogling all night. He doubted Magnus was oblivious what with the few times he had made eye contact.

Alec's heart was hammering in his chest as he thought about actually being alone in a room with him, no one else to break the ice. He felt like he was bordering on a panic attack. He knew Jace meant well, but this was too much. He was too nervous and inexperienced and this was too much pressure, even with everything everyone had been saying…

Before he could bolt, the door opened, and in walked the man Alec's eyes hadn't left all night.

To make things worse, Alec practically gaped at him, since up close he was even more stunning.

His dark eyes were lined with eyeliner, accented with dark eye shadows blended together and the glitter spread down his cheeks made his face even more luminescent and angelic than before. His hair was gelled into a funky sort-of relaxed style, and Alec could see the glisten of sweat on his arms. He was fully dressed, but there weren't many layers and they left little to the imagination.

"Hello. I'm Magnus." Magnus introduced, smiling wickedly, and Alec was grateful he was sitting because he was pretty sure his knees would've given out by now.

"Alec." Alec said, hoping his voice didn't quiver as much as he thought it did.

Magnus' smile broadened, and Alec wondered stupidly if Magnus introducing himself was an invitation for him to do the same. It was probably just what people in the business did. Stated their stage name to instigate the start of the show. Here Alec was, acting like it was a blind date. Good god, could he melt into the floor already!?

Magnus crossed the room and cracked open a bottle of water. "Forgive me for asking, handsome, but first timer?"

Alec couldn't help but groan and put his head in his hands. "Does _everybody_ who works here feel the need to point that out?"

Magnus chuckled, and Alec lifted his head, embarrassed that he was charmed by the sound. A little glow of warmth formed in his belly that he had been the one to make Magnus laugh. He had been watching others do it all night with a hint of jealousy.

"It's nothing to be ashamed of, Alexander." Alec didn't bother to correct him, too fascinated at the sight of him sipping at a bottle of water to form words. He also had a feeling Magnus had chosen his full name on purpose. "The only reason I ask is because it does change how I approach these situations. Some people, veterans to this place so to speak, come in here knowing what they want and expecting something specific. Others, like yourself, are new to the idea and need a little more guidance getting out of their shell. And there's a learning curve too, of what you want and what works for you. I've been doing this long enough that I've worked with a wide variety of experience levels, and trust me, the most important thing is just that you communicate with whatever dancer you are paired with. That means, if I do something that makes you uncomfortable, you say so, or if you'd like something altered to suit your tastes, tell me. I'm sure Raph gave you the big scaredown so you know if it's outside my comfort zone, I'll just tell you and we'll try something else that works for both of us."

Alec nodded. "That sounds… really reasonable."

His voice was working a little better now.

Magnus clapped his hands together. "Perfect! Now, shall we get started?"

Alec was grateful he was sitting on a couch since his hands gripped at the cushion for something to anchor himself too.

_Don't pass out. Don't pass out. Don't pass out._

The music filled the room, and, at first, Magnus didn't watch him. He was concentrating on the pole centered in the room, and Alec watched in fascination as he hooked a leg around it and did some complicated flip.

Would whooping in appreciation be acceptable here or would that just make him look like a complete idiot?

Alec chose to remain quiet but he found his body relaxing a little as he watched Magnus move.

He was still hyped up with nerves, but maybe the alcohol was settling in his system more, or maybe Magnus' pep talk helped, but Alec found himself having an easier time staring this time around. He knew Magnus was being paid to literally do this for him, but knowing there were no witnesses outside the one putting on the show made him feel a little more at ease. Being caught ogling a man still made him feel guilty, ashamed, the internalized homophobia he was getting better at battling still rearing its ugly head at times. Now, not only was Magnus being paid to show off for him, but Alec was _expected_ to be intoxicated. He was encouraged to fully give himself over to his desires. Well, within the code of conduct of course.

Alec found his teeth digging into his bottom lip as he watched the man move fluidly, his body rolling like a wave as his shirt settled on the floor.

With a sly smile, Magnus sidled up to him, digging a knee on one side of Alec's thigh and settling into his lap.

"This okay?" he asked quietly.

Alec couldn't speak, too shocked at how close the attractive man was to his body to form coherent words, so he nodded as Magnus properly straddled his lap. His body warmth immediately seeped into Alec's and he felt his mouth go completely dry.

Magnus continued his rolling motions, but this time his pelvis was coming in contact with Alec's, and Alec made an unintelligible sound at the friction, his eyes finding the ceiling as he tried to control his body's reaction.

"Still liking this?" Magnus murmured.

Was he trying to seduce him? His voice was so silky and smooth, Alec was surprised he didn't arrive right then.

"I-it's good. I-I'm just… y'know, trying not to be a preteen about it." he managed to choke out.

Magnus laughed, throwing his head back as it came from the depths of his belly, and the action caused his lower half to become even snugger to Alec's. Somehow, it seemed Magnus found his innocence and inexperience endearing.

"Well, the whole point is that you enjoy yourself. Are you enjoying yourself, Alexander?"

Alec nodded as Magnus flipped around so his ass was the one nudging Alec's crotch, his hand sliding up to cup the back of Alec's neck as he slid up and down his body.

Alec's breath was catching at the sensations rolling through him. His hands had found Magnus' waist to steady him, but so far, that was as adventurous as he had been.

"You're allowed to touch me, you know." Magnus teased against his ear, blowing a cool gust of air against the hot skin of his neck.

Alec, swallowing with difficulty, let his palm stroke over Magnus' toned abdomen, taking inventory of one side to the other. He grew in confidence a little as Magnus seemed to use it as encouragement to keep dancing and he let his thumb brush sensually below his belly button but well above his waistband so he wouldn't accidentally touch him where he had been formally forbidden.

Magnus leaned back, using Alec's shoulder as a rest for the back of his head as he unbuttoned his pants and let them slide off his legs. He kicked them off with a flourish, turning around to straddle him facing forwards again.

Alec closed his eyes, trying to think of unappealing things as his body was not hiding its arousal in any way, but Magnus seemed amused.

"Let yourself feel, Alexander. It would offend me if you weren't properly enjoying this." To make his point, he pointedly rubbed against Alec's erection, and the latter moaned, gasping for air at the end.

"You're going to be the death of me." Alec mumbled, hands sliding down to rest on Magnus' hips unconsciously to help guide their motion.

"I'll make sure to get off you once I'm fully nude."

Alec felt himself panic. "Um, actually, is it okay if we just stay like this? This is… already so much."

Magnus' eyes softened and he smiled. "Of course. Whatever you like."

Alec exhaled, the tension leaving his body again. He couldn't help but let his eyes find Magnus', mesmerized by the swirl of colours in his irises.

The man in his lap moved more deliberately as the song's tempo increased, and Alec felt his hips move upwards of their own accord.

Magnus leaned his forehead against his, chuckling a little under his breath. "You're certainly a breath of fresh air, Alexander."

Alec met his eyes again, finding adoration in Magnus', and without thinking, he closed the distance between them until his lips were flush to Magnus'.

It was soft despite the suddenness, Alec's lips melting against the older man's, before he wrenched back.

"Oh, god, oh god I'm so sorry." Alec whispered, feeling his eyes grow wet in humiliation. That was practically the _number one rule_ NOT to do, and there he went, ruining everything. It was Magnus' obligation to end things now, have Alec kicked out, never to return. He already felt a pang in his heart that he wouldn't see him again. But it was his own fault. His own stupid, desperate, intoxicated fault.

He was too drunk on alcohol and arousal to stop himself from doing stupid things, so it's not like he could exactly blame Magnus or the club for having that rule in the first place…

Instead of shoving him away and bolting, Magnus seemed eerily calm. His hands rested behind Alec's neck, him still in Alec's lap, and he was moving forward to kiss him again before Alec could catch up on what was happening.

It was gentle at first, but Alec couldn't control himself. Magnus was _kissing him_. His hands cupped his face in his hands as he kissed him back, and he whimpered against his mouth as Magnus' hips began rolling into his again.

Alec's mouth opened to Magnus as he kissed him deeper, hips never slowing, and Alec felt himself nearing the edge.

"Magnus… I'm… I'm _so close_ …" he whispered, muffled against his moving lips. The added sensation of Magnus' expert lips against his was heightening everything, and he knew his high was moments away.

"It's okay, Alexander. It's okay." Magnus promised softly, moving his mouth to suck on Alec's neck.

His teeth nibbled over his pulse point and that was it, he was done, the whole night had been too much.

Alec's body seized up, his back arching, as a breathy _"Magnus"_ escaped his lips. His hips stuttered as he came endlessly in his pants, his blunt nails dragging down Magnus' bare back as he gasped through his orgasm.

He stayed in his position, boneless, trying to catch his breath. His brain was fuzzy, unable to think of words to say, like 'thank you' or something.

Would it be weird to thank him? He did give him an orgasm, but he wasn't sure what the protocol was in this situation, as he never imagined actually coming undone in front of the man.

Magnus eventually dismounted him and brushed himself off before gathering his discarded clothes to swiftly redress.

"There's a bathroom just through there if you need to clean yourself up before you head back out." he said quietly.

Alec nodded, looking down at the floor now, embarrassed that he had just climaxed in front of a virtual stranger. He knew that Magnus had probably witnessed many over his time in the business, how could he not with moves like his, but he was sure many also kept themselves in control.

The shame from before started to creep again, locking his jaw and posture. He had just experienced his first orgasm at the hands of another man, imagined scenarios from his masturbation fantasies not counting, and it was making him feel a little overwhelmed. Also given that Magnus wasn't saying much either, and he wished the ground would swallow him whole.

Alec stood and moved to leave, afraid to look at him, afraid to find the disgust he was used to being associated with his sexuality.

He felt stupid, and humiliated, and just… sick. He wanted to leave. He had to leave after this. He was pretty sure Jace would be fine with it, as this was no doubt his finale for the night as it was, but Alec wasn't even sure if he could face him. He knew he'd start questioning him about how it was, teasing him, and Alec was feeling too vulnerable to play along.

"Alexander." Magnus' voice sounded strange, and Alec couldn't help but swivel to look at him.

His eyes grew strained at the sight of him, and Alec wondered if his self-loathing was as obvious as it felt.

Magnus crossed the distance between them and pulled him into a hug. Alec was so surprised by the action that he simply froze.

"I'm proud of you." he told him quietly, patting him on the back before slipping out of the room, shooting him one last coy smile before the door closed.

Alec didn't know what to think, still too stunned to gather all his thoughts, so he headed to the bathroom to clean himself up a bit.

Once done, he met up with Jace, his thoughts buzzing loudly in his head.

Jace smiled widely at him, but, catching the look on his face, his mouth slid into a frown.

"You okay?"

Alec nodded, not meeting his eyes. "Can we go?"

"Of course." Jace said seriously, slipping his arms through his jacket sleeves. "Thanks for everything, Maia." he added to the girl.

She, too, watched Alec in concern but waved them off with a forced smile.

* * *

Alec didn't speak much on the way home, too consumed with his thoughts. He didn't know what had happened, why Magnus had started kissing him back, and then everything following only solidified his confusion. Magnus seemed distant after they broke apart too, but then he was hugging him, telling him he was proud of him, and Alec didn't know what to believe.

But he didn't _know_ Magnus. He didn't even know what Magnus' real name was for god sakes. Strippers usually had stage names, for their protection. And his job description meant he was always putting on a show. So that meant any part of his personality, or all of it, could be nothing like the real man.

Jace was shooting him glances as they walked through the city, clearly worried about him.

"Alec?"

"Mmm?"

"Did… did something bad happen? In that room?"

Alec contemplated the question but shook his head. "No, no. It was… just… not what I was expecting, I guess." He forced a smile. "But you were right. Definitely got me out of my comfort zone tonight."

Jace stopped walking and pulled Alec's arm. "Alec, tell me the truth. Did I pressure you into this? Make you do something you didn't want to do?"

Alec's heart clenched. Of course Jace would blame himself. It was his idea in the first place and he was the one who booked the private dance. But Alec knew it wasn't anything Jace had done. As usual, it was Alec who screwed things up.

"No, Jace, it was great, honestly. The whole night. But I guess I just… didn't realize…" He didn't know how to word it, not sure how to make Jace understand. "I wasn't expecting it to be so… um, emotional, I guess?"

Emotions weren't ever something Alec was great at expressing, let alone talking about. But he wanted to make sure Jace understood that he was only in his head about things because he was processing.

"Oh."

Alec forced a smile, trying to forget about the flood of uncomfortable feelings after things had finished. "I had fun, though. I really did. Thank you for tonight."

Jace smiled genuinely now. "You're welcome. That's what best friends are for."

"And brothers." Alec added, slinging an arm around his shoulder and squeezing affectionately. "Can you imagine Mom and Dad's face if they were in there, though? THAT would've been fun."

Jace snickered, immediately up for the entertaining conversation.


	2. Corruption

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Please note the rating change.* Also lots more tags to make sure everyone knows what's coming. Sorry to ruin any suspense.
> 
> This ended up a lot more lengthy than I ever expected. Then again, it's not my fault these two losers are smitten kittens. As promised, the final part to this series. I've had so much fun writing this and you guys have been truly amazing.
> 
> Disclaimer: I did my best to remain accurate and realistic, but my sincerest apologies for anything that is lacking. Cisfemale writer here.
> 
> Also can be read on my tumblr [dylanobrienstyler.](http://dylanobrienstyler.tumblr.com/post/163156094021/hands-to-myself-part-ii)

Magnus had left Alec alone in the room hours ago, yet he swore he had left a piece of himself behind too.

He had gone back to work, trying to compartmentalize his thoughts as he usually did so he could focus on putting on the best show he could, but his mind drifted against his wishes. He certainly hadn't expected anything that ended up transpiring in that room when he first heard he had been requested for a private dance.

His eyes found the man he had just soloed for shortly after his return to stage, Alec meeting up with a blonde man around his age at the bar and heading out of the door immediately. He felt his heart sink at the concerned looks shared between the blonde and the bartender, knowing both were questioning what had upset the boy.

Magnus swallowed his pride and concentrated on the music, effectively pushing Alec to the back of his mind now that he had left the building for good.

Thankfully, his shift was only a couple hours longer and finally closing time came around. Magnus rushed towards the back room, ready to gather his things and get the hell out of there. He wanted to be alone with his thoughts; he'd clean up and take off his make-up at home.

"Everything okay with you, Mags? Maia said you stole someone's puppy earlier." his coworker and long-time friend Dot said as she sat down next to him.

"I did what?" he couldn't help but ask, bewildered by the statement.

Dot smiled a little. "One of your private requests. She said he left looking like someone stole his puppy. Did you reject him or something? Turn down a marriage proposal?"

Although it wouldn't be the first time he would've had to do so, at least the former, Magnus shook his head. "No, nothing like that. Just a little… sexual awakening for the young man, I think. Always a little rough."

Dot nodded sympathetically. "You've just seemed off since then too. Anything you want to talk about?"

Magnus cast his eyes around to see they were alone, some of the others already gone and the few still around away in the showers.

He wasn't sure if he was ready to talk about it though. Despite spending a lot of the night thinking about it, it wasn't exactly something prideful he was looking to admit.

Unfortunately for him, she didn't miss the guilt settling on his face. "Uh oh. I know that look. Something happened. What did you do?"

"Now, why would you assume I'm at fault here?" he said, hand on his chest in mock-incredulity.

"Because I know you, Magnus. What happened?"

Sensing defeat, he sighed. "I… I may have made a mistake with him. Broke a big rule."

Dot's eyes went round. "Magnus!" she whisper-shouted. "Raphael will kill you!"

"Not if he doesn't find out." he said, rolling his eyes at her dramatics. "Plus, he owes me a lot. I practically raised him."

"I don't think babysitting him every time his parents went away counts as raising him."

"It does when they were as absent from his life as they were."

Dot poked him in the shoulder. "Stop changing the subject. What. Did. You. Do."

Magnus exhaled, thinking back to the raven-haired boy. "Well, things were going well. Everything panning out as expected. He was shy and nervous but overly respectful, if anything. And then, to my surprise, in one heated moment, he leaned forward and kissed me."

His friend watched him carefully, seeming wary by his answer, as if waiting for more. "O-kay… here I thought it was a big deal. Sheesh, Mags, you know we've all had the odd one do that. Just because you didn't rat him out doesn't mean you're the devil. I mean, you said he was young, right? It was probably just a first timer mistake. It's not that wrong to let it slide."

He looked down, knowing he couldn't look his friend in the eye during his true confession. "Well, he pulled back in a panic, apologizing profusely, but I… I was the one who kissed him again."

This time Dot's jaw hit the floor. "Magnus!"

"I know, I know." he groaned. "But, Dot, I can't explain it. Something about him has me feeling a way I haven't in a long, long time. I haven't been able to get him out of my head all night. It's like he shoved all of my rationality and professionalism aside and nestled in like a stray cat."

Dot took his hands in hers, pulling out her best maternal intimidation look. "Magnus… you can't be doing things like that. Raph would lose his shit if he knew you were letting yourself fall for a client, and, more importantly, acting on it while you're working."

"I know." he said softly.

She squeezed his hands. "I'm sorry. I know you don't need the reminder. Are you going to see him again? See if something's really there?"

He blew out a breath. "Doubtful. I think I scared him off for good. That's what I get for freaking out after things finished up."

Dot nodded sympathetically. "Well, go home. Try to get some sleep. Maybe things will look better tomorrow."

Magnus half-shrugged, not even bothering to try to put his heart into her false optimism. "Goodnight, love."

"Goodnight."

Magnus threw his bag over his shoulder and exited out the back door, cutting through the alleyway in the hope of getting home faster.

He needed to get home, wash off, and hopefully rid his mind of the young man who had managed to reduce him to an adolescent with a crush.

"Hey, sexy. Did you come down here just for me?" a slurring voice came, browning teeth shining through a drunken grin as the man stepped out of the shadows.

Magnus felt his stomach clench. The last thing he could handle was one of the men from the club asking for more from him that he was giving. It wouldn't be the first altercation he had, and surely not the last, but tonight was not the night.

His jaw set. "No, I didn't. I'm just passing through. Excuse me."

Magnus made to rush by him, but the older man snagged him by the strap of his bag, pulling him back.

"Oh come on. I've seen the way you dance. You know how to give me what I want. And I want it now."

"You're going to have to look elsewhere." Magnus growled, wrenched his bag back.

The blow to his face took him by surprise, and Magnus found himself sprawled across the pavement before what happened caught up with him.

His arm stung and his hand reached up to touch his cheekbone, an angry mark no doubt forming from the hit he just received.

Instead of verbally responding, Magnus leapt to his feet with surprising speed and spun into a kick that hit the sleazy man directly in the chest, sending him soaring into a pile of garbage bags with a grunt.

"I have those moves because I do martial arts, prick." he spat at the man who was groaning, the wind knocked out of him.

Magnus rushed out of the alley and down the street. He was not going to wait around for him to gain his wits back.

God, he just needed to get home. Separate himself from human beings for a while. This night was just getting worse and worse. If one more thing happened, he swore—

But he was so distracted by his panic, he ended up running headlong into something solid, and, for the second time that night, he found himself falling backwards to the ground.

"Jesus, I'm so sorry. I didn't see you." a worried voice came, and Magnus looked up.

He couldn't control his jaw from dropping.

The man above him seemed to recognize him in the same moment and froze.

"It's not your fault. It's mine. I wasn't watching where I was going. Thank you, Alexander." he murmured as Alec helped him to his feet.

"I… um…. Are you okay?" Alec suddenly asked, catching on that the no doubt bruise forming on his face was not from running into Alec's chest, however solid it may be. "You're bleeding!"

Magnus looked down at his forearm, where he had scraped it after he fell the first time, and forced a smile. "Oh it's nothing. I just ran into somebody who was asking for more than I was giving, and, you know, he didn't like hearing the word no. It's not the first time. Price of the business and all." he rambled, not even sure what he was saying anymore.

Alec's eyes narrowed in concern as he swept his gaze over the Asian man. "Can I walk you home?"

Magnus wasn't sure what to say. On one hand, he'd be breaking about the biggest rule in the business ever. You don't _ever_ let a client know personal details about you, especially your home address. It couldn't have been a more stupid thing to do. Dot would kill him before Raphael even had a chance.

But something about Alec, from the beginning, made him trust that he was a good soul, so Magnus simply nodded, feeling the moisture push at his eyelids at the man's sweetness.

* * *

Once at his loft, the walk home virtually silent, Magnus dumped his stuff by the door and gestured Alec to make himself at home. Instead, Alec headed to the bathroom and managed to locate his first aid kit, before instructing Magnus to sit down and working on cleaning up his wounds.

"You don't have to do this." Magnus couldn't help but say as he sat pathetically before the man he hadn't stopped thinking about all night.

"I don't remember you forcing me into it, so I think it's safe to assume I want to." Alec teased gently, grimacing as Magnus' arm twitched when he applied alcohol to his skin. "Sorry."

Magnus shook his head to excuse his apology but didn't speak.

Once his scraped arm was cleaned up and looking less gruesome, one of Alec's big hands cupped Magnus' cheek to angle his face so he could get a better look at the mark.

"Whoever they were, they hit you pretty hard. You probably want to ice that to manage the swelling, but otherwise, I'm afraid you'll just have to wait for it to disappear on its own."

Magnus nodded, his eyes on the floor now, but Alec caught the drop of water that slipped from his cheek, and more followed against his will like a leaking roof.

Without a second thought, Alec moved to pull him into a hug, Magnus burying his face in Alec's shoulder.

"Shh, you're okay. You're fine. You're safe now." Alec murmured, stroking up and down Magnus' back, sliding up to nestle his fingers in his dark hair.

Magnus let himself be comforted. He knew he shouldn't, knew that it wasn't right to ask this of a stranger, but he hadn't felt this vulnerable in a long time. And he felt he could trust Alec somehow. He felt safe with him somehow.

It was part of the reason why he had screwed up so spectacularly at the club before. Alec had kissed him with such surprising gentleness that Magnus found himself completely lost in him and was kissing him again before his brain could catch up. And then Alec held his face in his hands like it was the most precious thing in the world. Even when he was free to touch him, a half-naked man he was clearly very attracted to, Alec stuck with gentle, tender strokes. Strokes that made Magnus feel worshipped, _loved_ even. It was such a contrast to the usual groping and pawing he normally endured that he completely forgot that he hadn't openly volunteered to be alone with Alec of his own accord.

And then Alec spent so much time watching his eyes, not peering at his body like some sort of ogling ape. Magnus was literally gyrating in his lap and Alec was completely entranced watching his face, holding eye contact. It was so intimate it had made Magnus shiver. He had never experienced anything of the sort in the business. He had no idea what to make of the man.

Normally, he had a pretty good sense when a man was about to climax. There were signs of course, especially when you were as close as Magnus was to Alec at the time. He had felt the shortened breaths, the loss of rhythm in his hips, the hardness of his arousal pressing against him. He had known when he was close, even without Alec's whispered warning. In a typical scenario, Magnus wasn't one to wait it out, instead ending things before they got to the point of no return. Sometimes he didn't have a chance to break things up, but he'd at least move away to make sure they didn't soil him too. But with Alec, he wanted to feel him cum. He wanted to experience him climaxing, to feel him spasm in his arms. Alec had been so dignified when he came, the way he sang Magnus' name out like a prayer, the way his body arced and shuddered through every last spasm. He was beautiful. He was downright glorious.

Once the euphoria of bliss passed, Magnus realized he had messed up. That he shouldn't have done such things. And the guilt for taking somewhat advantage of the young man ate at him. Alec had signed up for a private dance, sure, but he didn't sign up for someone to reverse their agreement to watch _him_ come undone. The show was supposed to be Magnus, not Alec.

So he folded in on himself, cursing his actions. He was the experienced, mature professional. He was the one supposed to be the one setting and maintaining the boundaries. And then the familiar look of shame had settled into Alec's features, and he remembered how inexperienced the boy was. He knew the look, knew the shame coating his skin was the fault of the fact that Magnus was a man who invoked such sexual pleasure that he climaxed right then and there. So Magnus crossed the room and praised the boy for his bravery, because he was brave. He not only gave himself over to a stranger, let himself be so vulnerable, but he had come to the club in the first place, agreed to something terrifying, and managed to do it all with great dignity and maturity despite his intense nerves. He knew many in a similar position who handled things entirely different and he couldn't help but admire him for it. He was on the difficult road to acceptance and part of that was the rocky pathway of enduring scary experiences like giving up control so you could feel what you really feel. He had a feeling Alec wasn't one to give up control easily either.

Magnus managed to get a hold of himself and pulled back from the kind man, blushing now. He wasn't sure it was noticeable given the mark on his face and his naturally darker skin tone, but he didn't want to meet Alec's eyes to find out.

"Hang on. I'll be right back." Alec murmured, disappearing again.

Magnus didn't really feel like moving anyways, the weight of the day pressing on him, and Alec returned a moment later with a bottle of make-up remover and some cotton facial pads.

Magnus felt the briefest of smiles ghost across his lips as Alec got to work cleaning off his face from the smudged, tear-stained make-up he was currently sporting. Well, if he was hoping to impress Alec on their next meeting, he was doing a bang-up job.

Alec worked silently, his brow furrowed in concentration as he worked, and Magnus tried not to find it endearing. He had a feeling Alec was sort of the intense type.

"Better." he said after a few minutes, leaning back to admire his handiwork.

Magnus certainly felt cleaner. He stood gingerly.

"Thank you. I'm just going to jump in the shower really quick. You know, try to wash off that creep."

Alec nodded and Magnus disappeared into the bathroom, hoping the water would clear his head.

* * *

Alec sat on the couch after cleaning up everything he had dragged out there, drumming his fingers against his thigh. The way Magnus had stated it, he assumed he was expecting Alec to be there after he got out. Or should he leave? He wasn't really sure what the protocol was. Was there a guidebook for what to do when you walk your stripper home after he's been attacked and you gave him first aid?

Alec let his eyes drift around the room. He couldn't help but be amused at how Magnus-like the loft was. Eccentric, elegant décor and a lot of bold colours and choices. A lot like how Magnus dressed at the club. Alec figured the bold side to him wasn't an act.

Alec noticed some mail on the coffee table. They were addressed to Magnus Bane. So Magnus was his real name? For some reason, the confirmation made him smile.

The identified man returned after a few minutes in just a silk robe, hair damp but looking much more like himself, sans make-up. He sat next to Alec, sending him a tender smile.

"Thank you, Alexander. For everything. You didn't have to come to my aid like that. I appreciate your concern, however, and that you helped me in my time of need."

"It was nothing." Alec said, rising to his feet. This was sounding like a polite farewell, and he figured he should take the hint and get going.

Magnus watched him inquisitively. "What were you doing roaming around alone at that hour anyways?"

Alec corrected his throat, not meeting the older man's eyes. "I, uh, couldn't sleep. So I went for a walk."

"You do know New York can be a dangerous city to wander alone in, right?"

"Well if I didn't before, I certainly know now." Alec reminded him, a sly smirk resting at the corner of his mouth.

Magnus tried to hide a smile and failed. "Something troubling you, Alexander?"

Alec didn't know what to say. It was sort of awkward to admit that he had been so wrapped up in thoughts about Magnus that he hadn't been able to sleep. He lay in bed for a couple hours before giving up, even the alcohol he consumed not helping encourage slumber.

"Just… couldn't shut my brain off, I guess." he said with a shrug.

Magnus stood to meet him, noticing now the height difference between them despite having walked next to him earlier. Alec had been sitting for most of the night before that, so he hadn't quite seen it for himself, but he didn't mind it at all.

"You have nothing to be ashamed of, you know. Feeling how you feel." Magnus stated.

Alec wondered in a panic if he could somehow read his thoughts, understand that Alec had developed stupid feelings for the man he barely knew in a very short period of time. But then he continued.

"I see it a lot at Pandemonium. Some people are comfortable with their sexuality, some are still battling some inner demons despite accepting it in some ways, and others are merely questioning. You seem to have mostly accepted yourself."

Alec nodded. "I, uh, come from a strict family who weren't exactly thrilled at the revelation. It's been… tough. Trying to balance being myself and being the son my parents want."

Magnus' eyes grew sorrowful. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay. I have really supportive siblings. Hence my reason for meeting you tonight in the first place."

"Ahh, your friend at the club?"

He nodded. "My brother Jace. Adoptive, technically, but he's been family long enough it feels the same."

"Any other siblings?"

"Two. My younger sister Isabelle and my little brother Max."

"So you're the oldest."

He nodded.

Magnus smiled, understanding the man before him a little more already. He had a certain level of expectations put on him, likely by his parents but no doubt by his own hands as well. Wanting to be a role model for his siblings, wanting to please his parents' wishes. Being gay under a strict household with all of those expectations hanging over your head would certainly be tough.

"What about you?"

Magnus shrugged one shoulder slightly. "Just myself, I'm afraid. My parents are long gone as well."

Alec's expression changed. "I'm sorry."

Magnus waved a hand, dismissing his concern. "It was a long time ago. I've done fine on my own."

After the words left his mouth, he wondered if Alec would agree, considering where they met. Not everyone supported the lifestyle he lived. He knew it could be tough to swallow.

And then of course, there was the way he behaved during their private session.

He took a deep breath. Now was as good a time as any, since the opportunity had presented itself. "I feel like I owe you an apology."

A line formed between Alec's brows, confusion etched on his face. "Why?"

"For what happened earlier tonight. At the club."

Alec felt his skin burn hot in embarrassment. Oh god, Magnus had read his mind and he was going to let him down gently. Apologize for leading him on. Tell him about the psychological facts behind clients falling for strippers, throw statistics at him so he didn't feel like a complete freak.

He should just run. Just run straight out of there and never look back.

But he was glued to his spot, eyes completely locked on Magnus.

"I… I crossed the professional line with you. It was my mistake. I shouldn't have taken things as far as I did. It started catching up to me after we finished up that I was taking advantage of you…"

But Alec cut in. "Taking advantage of me how? I kissed you first, remember?"

"That was just you, being caught in the moment…" Magnus dismissed. "I was the one who took things further."

"Did you hear me complaining?" Alec asked, flaring up a little at the idea of Magnus beating himself up over the best part of his night. "Magnus, I literally _got off_ while you kissed me because I enjoyed it so much. Do you honestly think I hadn't been wanting to do that all night? I wanted a lot more than that, but I didn't want to push and get kicked out or get you in trouble and I thought it was all me and you were just being good at your job… I couldn't sleep tonight because my mind kept drifting back to you, wondering if I upset you or grossed you out when I came in my pants like a pubescent schoolboy…"

Magnus didn't even realize he had stepped closer until he felt Alec's body heat bleed into the thin layer of his silk robe. He clued in rather quickly how undressed he was.

Alec was standing before him, chest rising and falling rapidly from his passionate argument, and Magnus felt longing light up his spine.

"Alexander…"

Alec looked down, seeming to try to gather his thoughts. "Look, it's fine that you don't feel this… connection to me that I feel to you. I get it. I'm young, I'm inexperienced, and I'm the last thing someone like you would be interested in. But don't try to push the blame onto yourself for the sake of my dignity. I know I screwed up. I'm sorry for that. I signed off on that stupid rule list and I still managed to mess up. But I know it was one-sided and you were just being nice, to make me feel less stupid. So don't… don't try to spare my feelings by blaming yourself."

Magnus was finding himself stepping closer, straightening up his posture to level with the man better, his air entering and exiting his lungs quicker too. He couldn't believe the blasphemy coming from the younger one. Did he really have no idea how captivating he was?

"Quite the contrary. Feeling you get off nearly set me off too, or could you not feel how aroused I was? My job, normally, is the very opposite of arousing, despite what it might seem. It's all groping hands and emotionless exchanges, faking smiles and attraction while going off to gag about it later." He turned away in shame. "But then I'm with you and I'm ready to climb you like a tree… The things I want to do to you, Alexander…"

And that was all he could take. He wasn't even conscious of his actions. All Alec knew was that he was suddenly crushing Magnus against his chest, lips descended on his as he kissed him fiercely on the mouth.

Magnus faltered a little, surprised, before groaning and knotting his fingers in his black hair, kissing him back just as hard.

This was the kind of passion he had been missing from the boy earlier—the guttural lust that he was acting on now made it clear he was as deep in as Magnus was. He loved the tender, gentle side too, but his attraction to the man before him left his desire running the show.

Alec was backing him up to the couch, causing Magnus to perch on the edge of the arm rest, stretching desperately to reach him. Alec's hands tucked under Magnus' thighs and guided him to wrap his legs around his waist. Magnus wasted no time in acquiescing, tugging his locked legs so their pelvises could meet deliciously. Alec wasn't the only one who whimpered at the friction. There were so few layers between them, but somehow too many at the same time.

For someone inexperienced, Alec certainly appeared to know what he was doing. His hands had found Magnus' lower back and was helping to support each thrust his hips pushed forward. Magnus' fingers tugged on the hem of Alec's shirt impatiently, and Alec yanked it over his head as if clothing was the most inconvenient thing invented. It almost made Magnus laugh right then, despite the heat forming between them.

But then Alec's mouth was placing scorching, open-mouthed kisses along his throat and he could barely concentrate on anything else. His fingers scratched at Alec's scalp, encouraging his motions, tightening his legs around his waist so he knew he very much liked what he was doing.

Alec's lips closed around his Adam's apple, smirking a little at the way it bobbed in retaliation, and then he switched to nibbling at the junction between his neck and collarbone, his hot tongue lathering over the spot as some sort of sensual finale.

All Magnus knew was this had to be one of the hottest make-out sessions he had had, and he wasn't exactly an innocent when it came to lovers.

His fingers found Alec's waistband and he worked on getting his zipper down and freeing the hardness he could feel beneath the material. His mind was so clouded with arousal he didn't even think to stop and ask if it was okay, his mind completely forgetting that Alec was less experienced despite his expertise showing otherwise.

But Alec seemed just as desperate, stepping back from his tight hold so he could push the pants over his hips. He kicked them away irritably before going back to what he was doing.

Magnus distracted him by finding his mouth with his own again, his nails scraping through Alec's chest hair and down to his toned abdomen. He'd have to ask him about his workout regime later because Alec could very easily blend in at Pandemonium with the incredible body he had. Magnus' hands could barely find a spot to stay, wanting to touch all of him, to fully consume the man before him.

There was a happy trail of dark hair leading to below his boxer brief's waistband, where the bulge of arousal was pressing against Magnus. He finally gained enough oxygen to fuel his brain cells into speaking coherent English.

"Alexander… are you sure you want to keep going? This feels like it's heading in a very specific direction and I don't want you to feel like you have to do this to keep me interested. Trust me, I'm interested. In more than just your body."

Alec was panting hard now, leaning his weight into Magnus to keep himself steady. His hair was mussed, lips plump and dark, and Magnus was a little proud at how thoroughly corrupted he looked. He looked like walking sex.

"I know. I am for you too." he said, and Magnus shivered at the husky quality to his tone. "But this… feels oddly right. I don't know how to explain it, but I've felt magnetized to you all night… It feels like this, me and you, was inevitable."

Magnus' eyes widened at the proclamation, surprised at the confession that coincided with his own feelings. He had felt a pull to Alec almost instantly and he too felt as though there was something stronger dragging them together.

"Okay. But you tell me, no matter how far things get, if you want to stop at any time, okay?"

Alec nodded, pulling him into another deep kiss to distract him before he jolted his own hips to help gain leverage to lift Magnus up into his arms. Magnus whined into his mouth, pressing his body flush against his lover's, and Alec attempted to find the bedroom without separating them too much.

"We could've done things out there, you know. I wouldn't have minded." Magnus teased against his ear as Alec climbed on top of him on the silk sheets.

Alec rolled his eyes. "Forgive me for wanting to be a gentleman."

The look of adoration Alec had caught at the club earlier in the night shone through Magnus' eyes again, and this time Alec leaned down to kiss him softer, slower, taking his time to tumble his lips over the other man's.

Magnus immediately met his pace, hands sliding languidly down Alec's muscular back, skimming across his ass and back up again.

He didn't miss the little twitch his intimate touch invoked, and his lips curled up in a smile against Alec's mouth.

"Shut up." Alec grumbled.

Magnus laughed, effectively breaking the kiss. "I didn't say anything."

Alec chose not to respond, instead zoning his eyes on the gaping robe. So far it was only giving him a good view of the expanse of Magnus' chest, but he knew it was hiding more. More that he couldn't wait to reveal.

But of course, his nerves were beginning to settle in. It was only natural now that his adrenaline was dying down. His instinct had taken over when he was fueled by frustration and pent up sexual tension, but now, as things settled into a more comfortable rhythm between them, his anxiety found time to awaken.

Magnus seemed to catch on, his eyes reading the change in expression. Alec had been completely dominant and in control when his body was leading things, but now it seemed his mind was battling to overthrow it.

"Hey. We can take things slow." Magnus reminded him.

Alec breathed through his nose. "I just… haven't really done… much of anything. I wish I knew how to avoid disappointing you."

Sensing his emotions catching up with him, similar to at the club, Magnus tugged so Alec was lying next to him, switching to his side so he could look at him properly.

"Alexander. Don't psyche yourself out. I may be experienced, but this is my first time with you, which makes me vulnerable too. I don't know your preferences, or what you like. It's about discovering each other, and sometimes it can be a bumpy road. We just need to communicate with each other and try to relax and enjoy it."

Alec remembered a similar spiel at the club before his private dance and exhaled slowly. He was right, of course. Alec just had a hard time convincing the rest of him to stop thinking and let himself go.

Magnus reached out to touch his face, rubbing his thumb across Alec's cheekbone. "The only way you will disappoint me is if you don't speak up when you're uncomfortable in any way, okay?"

Alec finally found his lungs working on their own better and nodded.

Sensing a win, at least for now, Magnus crossed the distance between them and began kissing him again.

Alec forced himself to relax and focus on the feel of Magnus' mouth on his own, moving closer as Magnus' tongue licked its way inside his mouth.

He hooked an arm around Magnus' waist and lifted him so he was lying on top of his chest, causing Magnus to twitch his hips in reaction.

"What?" Alec couldn't stop himself from asking, wondering why Magnus seemed to enjoy that quite a bit.

He rolled his eyes to the heavens. "I'd explain, but then you'd probably argue with me for ten minutes, and I'd rather get naked with you."

Alec's body was the one who reacted that time, his bulge of arousal nudging against Magnus' growing erection.

He moved forward to kiss him again, and, with newfound confidence, began slipping Magnus' robe down his arms and off the bed in a graceful swoop.

Finding the strength to open his eyes, he let his eyes roam down the length of Magnus' body, and just as quickly threw his head back against the pillow in anguish.

Magnus tried to keep his amusement at bay, instead kissing along Alec's neck at an attempt at a distraction.

"Like what you see?"

Alec turned his head and made a muffled groan into the side of the pillow. "I'm most definitely gay. Didn't really doubt it before but there's no denying it now."

Magnus grinned, and Alec couldn't help but smile as he gazed back at him. It was still pretty surreal that he was in bed with the magnificent man that he was. That Magnus wanted him too.

Determined not to waste a minute of it, he cradled a hand behind Magnus' head and pulled him into a heated kiss, hissing in desire as Magnus deliberately rubbed his hardness into Alec's clothed one.

Alec bit his lip as he wriggled underneath Magnus, slipping a hand between them to push his underwear down.

Magnus caught on quickly and helped him remove it, giving a similar noise of appreciation Alec had allowed his nakedness.

Both bare-skinned and exposed, Alec wasn't really sure what to do next. He knew this was sort of the beginning, and he knew from his own personal education on the matter about the logistics to get to the end, but the middle where things got built up to reach that end, he wasn't so sure.

Thankfully, Magnus knew was he was doing and stretched above him to get at his night table drawer.

He slipped a bottle out of the wreckage and left it to the side as he crawled up to meet their mouths again.

"I'm going to touch you, okay?"

Alec made an unintelligible sound but nodded quickly, bracing himself for the oncoming pleasure so he didn't lose complete control. Still, when Magnus' slicked hand made contact with his sensitive flesh, his hips bucked upwards into the closed fist against his wishes.

Magnus didn't let it slow his motions though, his strokes starting out slow and lengthy before picking up pace.

"Magnus…" Alec moaned, arching his back to get himself closer to the tightness surrounding him.

He was gorgeous like this, Magnus couldn't help musing, as Alec gripped the silk sheets in his fists, his skin flush and his body in complete control again. Seeing him losing himself to his pleasure was intoxicating.

Alec's hand clawing at his arm caught his attention and he slowed his hand's movements.

"It's too good… I don't want this to end so soon…" Alec mumbled, his voice catching when Magnus' wrist twisted a little as he removed his hand.

Once he had a hold of himself, Alec propped up on one elbow and scooted over to where Magnus was lying. He wasn't really sure what he should do next, but he knew he wanted to try being a more active participant. The only thing was that he had never tried anything sexual on anyone else before, so he wasn't exactly confident in how to get Magnus to the overly pleased mess he had managed to get him to twice in one day.

However, what Alec lacked in experience, he made up for in determination, and he was damn well determined to make Magnus feel even half as good as he had made him.

"Can I touch you too?" Alec murmured, the idea already making his skin shiver.

"Of course." Magnus replied, fingers teasing at Alec's dark locks. He seemed so very at ease, and the comforting feeling of his hand in his hair gave Alec an idea.

Shimmying down the length of the bed, Alec got comfortable on his knees on the rug. He made sure to pull the lube down to his end and spread his hands up the tops of Magnus' thighs.

Magnus seemed to catch on to where he was going since he exhaled heavily, his body curling up on itself in preparation of what was to come.

Alec ran his thumbs up his inner thighs, spreading his legs a little more and trying to figure out how to best situate his lover's body. He hadn't ever had something of this nature done to himself but had seen plenty of visual evidence during his time alone, so he guided Magnus' legs over his shoulders and nestled himself closer to the heated flesh before him.

He was happy to see his own pleasure had had an effect on the older one's anatomy, and he grasped the firm appendage in his hand. With a drizzle of lube on his palm, he slid his hand down to the base, somewhat fascinated by the neatly trimmed hair around there. He supposed Magnus' lifestyle sort of dictated things like that, but he'd be lying if he said it didn't lessen some of the intimidation of taking him deep into his mouth.

Magnus had only twitched under his touch, remaining quiet so far, and Alec had a feeling it was to avoid scaring him off. He was practically equivalent to a skittish deer; one wrong move or slightest of noises, and off he would run, never to look back.

However, once Alec let his lips surround the head, Magnus let out a guttural moan that sounded near primal in nature. It made it very hard for Alec not to grin in pride.

Instead, Alec ventured further, using his hand to massage the opposite end as he kitten-licked at the tip and along the length. He tested different techniques, using different pressures and amount of tongue, soft kisses and hard sucks along the skin and behind to where his other sensitive flesh lay, but the best was the most obvious—when he took Magnus fully in his mouth.

Magnus keened once he was fully enveloped in Alec's mouth, his fingers raking through his hair in encouragement. He was trying to control his hips from thrusting forward into the wet heat, knowing that that would be too much too fast, but it was extremely difficult, especially when he sat up to see the twinkle of utter excitement in Alec's eyes.

Alec sucked deeper, breathing better through his nose now that he was starting to get the hang of what he was doing and the nerves were subsiding, and he tried his best to apply pressure with his tongue to the vein pulsing beneath the shaft. The weight of Magnus in his mouth was oddly satisfying, Alec gradually taking in extra length as he tipped his chin to let more of him in, and Magnus' shaky petting to his hair alerted him that he was doing just fine.

After a few enjoyable moments, Alec pulled back, mostly to gulp in oxygen, but he let the tip of his tongue slide between the glistening slit at his head, and Magnus' whining gasp was proof that his instincts were better than he anticipated.

He couldn't stop the proud beam from gracing his face and he climbed up the length of Magnus' body, pressing kisses all along the definition of his torso as he ascended and then across the expanse of Magnus' handsome face. He was especially tender over the sore spot on his cheekbone, wanting to leave a different reminder on the painful skin.

Before Alec could ask about borrowing a toothbrush, Magnus pulled him into a heady kiss, knocking Alec breathless for another time that night. He didn't seem to care where his mouth had been, more focused on making his gratitude known.

"I want to try something else. If you're up for it." Alec explained quietly, once they had managed to separate.

Magnus, intrigued, slipped his fingers between Alec's, interlocking their hands. He squeezed reassuringly. "What's on your mind?"

Alec bit his lip, not really sure how to voice what he was thinking without stumbling on the words in embarrassment. He wasn't one to expose himself so bare, despite what his current attire dictated.

His tongue wet his lips before he spoke. "I wanted to… try taking things… one step further." He peeked up to read Magnus' expression, hoping he'd understand what he was getting at.

It seemed to dawn on him a moment later, eyebrows jumping in surprise.

"Alexander… You know penetration isn't the only way to have sex, right? That's a heteronormative idea that's outdated. What we've been doing, what other ways we can give each other pleasure… all of that can fall under the same realm as intercourse."

Alec nodded. "I know. I just… I'm curious." he mumbled, feeling the blood rushing to his cheeks now. "I'm sorry. We don't have to. If you don't want to, it's fine—"

Magnus cupped his face with one hand to turn his face to him. "I didn't say that." he said softly. "I just don't want you to feel like we have to hit every item on a checklist tonight. I don't want you to be a one-night stand, Alexander. I want to get to know you more, inside and outside the bedroom. But if you're eager to try more tonight… well, I'm up for that too."

Alec's eyes went round. "Really?"

Magnus chuckled. "You are really oblivious to your allure, my dear."

Magnus sat up, crawling down to where the lube was and slicking his own hand up with it. Alec was confused at first before Magnus lay back and spread his legs, and then, well, he was rather distracted watching Magnus touch himself where he couldn't see.

Magnus spoke as if he wasn't intimately engaged in his own foreplay. "Did you have preference on position? I figure it'll be easier due to my past experience if you top this time around."

Alec nodded quickly, trying not to jump out of his skin. It was already so much. He was secretly grateful Magnus was taking care of things himself, as he wasn't sure he could handle it after how incredible the night had already been. The fact that he held it together so far was a tough feat.

"I probably won't last long." Alec admitted, wondering if he was setting Magnus up for something he couldn't see through to the end.

Magnus tugged his hand in his own so he moved closer. "That's okay, love. I'm enjoying just being with you."

Alec smiled into their kiss, finding it easy to relax when Magnus was kissing him so tenderly. Even in the more heated kisses, there seemed to be some hidden gentleness behind each brush of his lips, as if marking him with affection every time their lips met. It was tantalizing, getting lost in the warmth of Magnus' mouth, his tongue, the feel of his hot breath intermingling with his own. Alec almost forgot what was yet to come until Magnus was moving his legs to encircle Alec's waist.

Alec got to his knees on the bed, looking down at his lover, who was glistening with a light sheen of sweat due to the night they had had already. Strands of hair were sticking to his forehead, his swollen lips between his teeth, but his eyes were bright and sparkling with something he couldn't quite put his finger on.

"I've opened myself up some. It may take some time but my body should adapt once you're inside me." Magnus explained, fidgeting on the bed so he was at a better angle.

Alec felt his legs quake, unable to believe what was happening. How the hell did he even get here?

Magnus held up a hand and stretched to dig into his drawer again, producing a foil packet.

“Magnus, I’ve never… been with anyone else. And I trust you.” Alec told him, eyes darting away a little in bashfulness.

Magnus smiled as he helped him put it on. “I trust you too, Alexander. And Raphael forces us to get monthly screening tests, even if it hadn’t been ages since I’ve been with anyone. But it also makes for an easier clean-up, you know.”

Not able to argue with that, Alec waited until he removed his hands before he concentrated on the task at hand.

Inhaling a deep breath, he pushed himself closer, grasping onto Magnus' thighs to help guide his body correctly to where it needed to go.

The first nudge into the ring of muscle nearly made him collapse onto Magnus' chest, it being too long in the evening since he had been touched there, and Magnus reached up to press encouraging kisses to his chest.

Breathing in again, Alec rocked his hips forward, and this time it was Magnus who reacted, his back curling as he dug his head into the mattress.

A spark of confidence lit inside Alec's chest, and he gripped Magnus' thighs tighter as he did his first proper thrust.

Another groan sounded from the man beneath him, and Alec wasn't sure if it was pleasure or pain, or maybe a mix of both.

"Keep going." Magnus rasped, clutching at Alec's back now for something to anchor himself to.

Alec obeyed, rolling his hips again, and again, and Magnus was soon meeting them with a thrust of his own. The tight fist that had grasped Alec earlier was barely preparation for the feeling of Magnus' taking him in. The hot clenching around his arousal was making his breaths come out in short spurts, feeling the fire lighting his spine like a flame getting out of hand.

Alec clasped one of Magnus' hands in his, fingers interlaced, digging their locked fist into the mattress as his other arm supported him above him as he snapped his hips up into his lover earnestly, chasing the burning that was finding his nerve endings. He hoped Magnus was as close as he was.

Magnus was a writhing mess below him, having left scratches on every bit of skin of Alec's he could grab, clawing at his back with his free hand as Alec found his sweet spot.

It seemed he knew as soon as he had, since he moved a hand to tug up Magnus' thighs so he could hit it again, and Magnus was seeing stars behind his eyes as he wheezed Alec's name like a plea.

And then Alec was falling, hips losing all rhythm and control, legs quaking as his back bowed in defeat while his orgasm ripped through him like a grenade. He was burying his face in Magnus' chest, higher octave whines slipping through his lips as he endured the best high of his life.

Magnus was spilling through his own shortly after, sucking in bursts of air as his body rumbled through the current of white hot pleasure.

Alec stayed inside him for an extra moment, reveling in how intimately close he felt with another human and one so special, before freeing them both and flopping in a heap next to Magnus.

He removed the used contraceptive, tying it in a makeshift knot before sending it sailing into the garbage bin next to the night table.

Once back to earth, Magnus leaned over the edge of the bed and used a fallen throw blanket to clean them both up some. Then his hand settled into Alec's damp hair, teasing the strands while Alec caught his breath.

Alec finally rose his head to take in his expression.

All he was met with was a lazy, loving smile and he couldn't help but return one of his own.

"Sleepy yet?" Magnus murmured, settling back into the pillows.

Alec simply grumbled like a moody cat and nuzzled into his side, curling his leg around Magnus' thigh and listening to the steadying of Magnus' heart as it calmed into a slower pace. Magnus' knuckles ran light strokes over his back, until they too slowed and sunk to a simple, loving hold.

Once Magnus was safely in dreamland, Alec realized he hadn't exactly told anyone where he was going earlier when it was simply a night walk through the city, as the last thing he expected to happen was to be falling asleep in the arms of a man he was crazy about.

Managing to find his phone in his discarded clothes while still holding on to Magnus with one arm, Alec sent a quick text to his brother.

_Hey, so, you know how I said I wouldn't find my romantic awakening at a strip club? Yeah… about that... How do you think Mom and Dad will take me dating a stripper?_


End file.
